Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
