i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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