Your mouth is God's brothel.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
