Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize