At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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