Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Randomize