You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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