If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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