party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I have demons in me.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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