What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
