Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
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