Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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