Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
