Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
