If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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