If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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