i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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