My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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