I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
How's work?
Spinning.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
