We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
