Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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