Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
