It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
