So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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