I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
