Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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