So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
