I accidentally had phone sex last night
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
i think im in europe. pls send help
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
