somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
