I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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