tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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