you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
