Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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