What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
