I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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