Define "chronic" masturbator.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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