I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize