is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
