Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
