I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
