I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
So many bounce houses so little time
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
