i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
