Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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