When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
