You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
