By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
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So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
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All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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