How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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