my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
