"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
