I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
