the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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