I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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