Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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