He disabled his match.com account in front of me
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
